~ Is Glad to be Back ~

Spending a week on Pheonix viewer really made me see that I had settled quite well to Viewer 2 considering I gave out so much about changing to begin with.

Following a week of crashes, baldness, unaware of my nudity or wearing of pink spanx it appears I am now back on second life and boy it feels good to see my avi again and not some grey or cloud like "thing".

Molly is me.  Not being able to see Molly is weird.  Knowing I'm there but as a cloud or grey person just isn't good enough.  I have become too demanding and superficial I think.

Thanks so much everyone for the kind messages and for all those that tried to help me in so many ways.  The advice, the emails, the suggestions and those that didn't care if I ended up in the sea if I sat down or those that tp'd to see me because my tp was broken.  Love you xxxxx

Molly is Broken..

It seems forever since I've had a chance to actually log into the blog and update you on the life of Molly...that and I totally forgot my password and kept entering the wrong email address and username so I couldn't reset it.  The joys of being blonde irl I guess.

This is Molly right now, she was a cloud up to about two hours ago then she became this wonderful butterfly.  She still has no groups, no offline friends, no inventory and can only stay online for a few moments before crashing offline.

Second Life no longer works at all.  I had to download Pheonix to log in and am finding it strange as I had really only recently discovered how much I actually like viewer two.  Linden seem to have a new beta in production so probably just as well I wasn't getting too comfy with viewer two.  I have sent them, them being Linden, a ticket and they promise they'll get back to me in 24 hours but I know they're very busy so Molly being broken isn't high on the priority list.

So right now Molly is a mess, a bald, pink leotard wearing, footless mess who can't tp so if you see me online say hello and come visit me as for now it looks like I'm a pretty mess that is trapped in Harmony :)

Love - John Lennon

Love is Real..

Everyone has felt love at one point in their life.  Love of something, someone or some place.  It's a feeling that is sometimes so difficult to put into words.  Love just is.

There are so many levels of love but each one is so real.  Even in a virtual world we grow to have feelings for and love people.  Some find this strange and hard to believe and even hard to accept.  Virtual or otherwise love is real.

While you were sleeping....

I have a temper; one that I attempt to control and as I get older realise I must control.  It rarely sees the light of day unless seriously provoked but when it does there is one person givin the task of calming me down and I don't envy him one bit.  

Today was one of those days.  

I was checking my mail randomly when following reading three im's I realised while I was sleeping, my land had been reclaimed on second life, sold to someone else, who returned all my things.  The reason then given, Edwin Finl Estates sold me someone else's land.  Might I add the land was purchased back in Mid September and my tiers were almost four weeks in advance and no one had made me aware of any problem before all this happened over night.  

I logged in to find a fortress around my land and ban lines keeping me out.  Not that I even wanted to go there but the sickening reality dawned.  I have owned land with Edwin Finl for over a year and this is what is done to a long standing customer.  

*

"[15:55] Essel Sands Parcel 6: Your rental at Paupers Valley 22, 240, 23 <Paupers Valley (22,240,23)> has been terminated and you have been refunded L$2016. You have been evicted for Failure to pay your tiers."

*

The thing that really drove me insane was saying I had been evicted for failure to pay my tiers when it is clear to see I had been refunded as part of the same comment.

So I went in search of a new home, new land, with a trustworthy landlord.  Hard when you don't trust anyone now but the love and support, encouragement and help has been such that I am truly overwhelmed.  I've even made a new friend, Tessa, who is partaking in the journey with me.

The amazing Tsai welcomed me into her home and offered me a bed to lie in and a ship to sail in, who can say that they have friends like that.  Even Dad offered me my old room back (haha).

Nothing on there is as it seem's but the friendships I have made are sincere and I am grateful everyday for each and every one.

While you were sleeping and I was writing, I was thinking of you and thanking you for being part of my everyday.

Mol x

The Tear that Stains..

The room is still, quiet, nothing at all stirs.

Outside the creaking floor boards can be heard in the stillness relaxing after a hard days work supporting those that thread on them.

The birds can be heard whimpering, their tunes now gone to that place called "memory".

All is still and quiet, the perfect time for those images to explode as they do into the now calm space.

Dreams shattered.  Happiness torn away.  The shared smiles gone.  Each moment that led to this is analysed over and over.  Eyes are rubbed gently, fingers massage the sockets almost trying to relieve the pressure now being felt and then without notice or invite it comes.

Making it's way down, slowly, soaking into the skin as it meanders down stopping at the corner of the lip and its salty taste then causes a jerking back to reality.
The head turns from side to side as if looking for the answer, the cure, the solution but all that is retrieved is a tissue to blow the nose which is now stifling thanks to the arrival of the tears.

One after another they quietly make their way down the face, drenching the skin and causing a loss of breath intermittently.  After a while the tears slow and stop.  Calm is restored.

The head then rests exhausted from the tension, hurt and loss felt.  The heart feels heavy, low and sad.

A body aches to be held, hugged.  A face stained with tears, the scars of hurt etched in tired eyes, a downtrodden gaze.
Eyes close, breath is inhaled softly but deeply and a body yearns to once again escape to dream.

What do you do?

You are cleaning, sweeping the dust out from under the bed and you reach in further with the broom, stretching into the corner and sweeping the dust towards you.  Crouched on the floor at an awkward angle you pull the brush towards you, holding it steady against the floor so as not to risk losing the dust.  Then you see it, first the hair bobbin that does not belong to you and then the cock ring.

Your mind goes numb, you try to think of a rational explanation to this but you can't.  You start to wonder if they were there before the bed was put there?  You go quiet and then you start to sweep again, wondering whether to hide what you have just found by just trashing it, or asking the questions that you know still won't give peace to your mind.

You keep sweeping the room.  Two clips are found and now you start to wonder what else will you find, so you stop sweeping.  You put the brush aside and sit.

Your phone beeps to life.  It's him.  What do you do?  What do you say?  Do you say anything?

Looking at the pile of dust on the floor, with the hair bobbin, cock ring and two clips, you press call on your phone.  He answers, you let him know you are home and what you are doing, all the while listening for a reaction in his tone.  Nothing.

He'll be home straight after work.

You continue to sweep the contents into a dust tray and empty them into a small bag.  You leave the bag in the sink in the utility room and you sit.  You start to think about how you are going to ask him or if you will, you really just don't know what to do.

What would you do?

Under Construction...